Monday, November 7, 2011

Where There's Smoke, There's Fire, Or Vice Versa

You have to love a small town paper.

The Times Republic's articles are no longer published in their entirety. That means there isn't much to extrapolate. However, today there's a hint at a dandy:

Here is the excerpt:

"A rural Onarga fire Thursday resulted in a manufacture and possession of cannabis arrest.

Kimberly K. Baxter, 46, was arrested on charges of unlawful manufacture of cannabis sativa plants and unlawful possession of cannabis.

At 5:26 a.m. Onarga and Gilman fire departments were called to a house fire at 1168 North 800 East. It was multi-story farm house, said Onarga Fire Chief Bob Poole. One section had two stories and one section was just one story."  

I'm glad we got the layout.  But, that can't be the whole story . . .

Because I don't have access, I have to guess these are quotes from the rest of the article:

"Numerous passers-by, from as far away as Champaign and Chicago, were treated for smoke inhalation - some two or three times."

"Firefighters battled the blaze for nearly fifteen hours before extinguishing the last glowing embers. The firefighters' exhaustion was evident as their equipment and trucks were left at the scene while the firefighters drifted to Monical's Pizza in Watseka where they ate dozens of pizzas and drank countless pitchers of root beer and coca cola."

"When the State Fire Marshall, who had been on the scene for hours, was asked what started the fire he replied: 'Dude . . . it's fairly obvious that . . .  uh . . . um . . . er . . . . could you repeat the question?'"